Steve didn't particularly want to be comforted at that moment. He wanted to wallow in his grief and guilt, even though a part of him knew that he'd done the right thing, that his ma had been hurting and she understood his decision, would've made the same one if she'd been in his place.
"Doin' the right thing always hurts, Stevie," she'd told him. "Don' ever let anyone tell you diff'ren'. It's never easy, and it hurts, and tha's how you know it's right. If doin' the righ' thing were easy, everybody would do it."
She'd never tell him anything like that again. She wouldn't be around to see what he made of his life, to learn about Marie, that he had two soulmates. Sure he'd told her in the hospital, but he couldn't even be sure she'd been aware of what he was saying.
Steve's first, uncharitable thought at Marie's words was you're really bad at being comforting, aren't you? He didn't say it out loud thankfully, too busy still hiding his face against Bucky's shoulder and sobbing. But her last words penetrated a little through the haze, digging into his mind and settling, little seeds of hope. We're here for you. You're not alone.
He'd never really been alone, he could barely remember a time back before he'd had Bucky as his soulmate, his constant companion. But Bucky had been the only one he could ever really trust. He'd learned the hard way that people only showed interest if they wanted something from you, or just wanted to make fun of you behind your back. But now there was Marie, and she wouldn't do that, he was sure. Becoming soulmates didn't change you, or the other person, but it did mean that they were the best person for you. He couldn't imagine having a soulmate who treated him the way others had, and that in itself was a comfort. He had two people to support him, unconditionally.
But that also meant that he'd need to pull his weight, and support them as well, when they needed it. He could do that. Maybe not right now, but soon.
Finally pulling away from Bucky's shoulder - which of course meant he had to press back more against Marie, but that was okay - Steve nodded as he wiped quickly at his cheeks. "Thank you," he said quietly. He gave a sniff, rubbing the back of his wrist under his nose. "We should get you home," he told Marie, not sounding particularly happy about the idea, but he didn't want her neighbors wondering where she was, and she couldn't stay with them. Not yet, anyway. Just because they were soulmates, didn't mean some propriety wasn't still required.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2017-03-02 04:23 am (UTC)"Doin' the right thing always hurts, Stevie," she'd told him. "Don' ever let anyone tell you diff'ren'. It's never easy, and it hurts, and tha's how you know it's right. If doin' the righ' thing were easy, everybody would do it."
She'd never tell him anything like that again. She wouldn't be around to see what he made of his life, to learn about Marie, that he had two soulmates. Sure he'd told her in the hospital, but he couldn't even be sure she'd been aware of what he was saying.
Steve's first, uncharitable thought at Marie's words was you're really bad at being comforting, aren't you? He didn't say it out loud thankfully, too busy still hiding his face against Bucky's shoulder and sobbing. But her last words penetrated a little through the haze, digging into his mind and settling, little seeds of hope. We're here for you. You're not alone.
He'd never really been alone, he could barely remember a time back before he'd had Bucky as his soulmate, his constant companion. But Bucky had been the only one he could ever really trust. He'd learned the hard way that people only showed interest if they wanted something from you, or just wanted to make fun of you behind your back. But now there was Marie, and she wouldn't do that, he was sure. Becoming soulmates didn't change you, or the other person, but it did mean that they were the best person for you. He couldn't imagine having a soulmate who treated him the way others had, and that in itself was a comfort. He had two people to support him, unconditionally.
But that also meant that he'd need to pull his weight, and support them as well, when they needed it. He could do that. Maybe not right now, but soon.
Finally pulling away from Bucky's shoulder - which of course meant he had to press back more against Marie, but that was okay - Steve nodded as he wiped quickly at his cheeks. "Thank you," he said quietly. He gave a sniff, rubbing the back of his wrist under his nose. "We should get you home," he told Marie, not sounding particularly happy about the idea, but he didn't want her neighbors wondering where she was, and she couldn't stay with them. Not yet, anyway. Just because they were soulmates, didn't mean some propriety wasn't still required.