Soulmates Through Time

[mini_steve]

"Not tonight, Buck," Steve said, unable to hide the weariness in his voice. He shuffled some papers on his desk, tidying up, and pointedly not looking at his friend.

Bucky sighed, tilting his head as he watched Steve, his mouth pulling down to the side unhappily. "You gotta get out there more, Stevie," he tried coaxing. "You'll never find--"

"I got you, don't I?" Steve's brows drew together in upset, but he still didn't look over at Bucky.

The two had known each other since they were little, and as soon as they'd shaken hands upon first meeting - imitating how they'd seen their parents do so - they'd stared at each other, wide-eyed, just knowing that they'd spend their lives together. They'd never questioned it, even though at the time they hadn't really understood the idea of 'soulmates', besides hearing snippets of adult conversations that mostly went over their heads.

Steve had asked his mother about it, several months later. When she'd described the utter feeling of rightness, of knowing this one, single person would always understand and be there for you, supporting you, but also pushing you to be your best... Steve had nodded, and with all the gravity of a five-year-old, had told his mother that Bucky was that for him.

Unlike how most mothers probably would've reacted to the precocious statement, brushing it off as a child enjoying having a new best friend, his mother had stilled and become quiet, looking at him for long moments. "Is he really, baby?" She'd finally questioned, in her sing-song Irish lilt. Steve hadn't been able to take his eyes off her, even as he nodded, willing her to believe him.

Sarah had bundled him up close, kissed his forehead, and just held him in her lap (he really was too old to be held like that, but he still fit, and he liked it, so he never complained). "I'm glad, Steve. I'm so glad you found your Someone so soon."

Now, Steve finally turned to look at Bucky. "Why're you still even goin' ta those things? They're for people looking for their soulmates." He rubbed his right palm heel with his opposite thumb, almost looking like he was massaging a cramp; it was a nervous, comforting gesture he always did, but especially when discussing anything concerning soulmates. Right over the odd oblong shape at the base of his hand, that matched Bucky's. Their soulmarks. Steve had never seen one so low on anyone else's arm; usually they were higher, denoting how old the person was when they'd first touched their soulmate, and found their Someone.

"Some people just like havin' a good time, Steve," Bucky sighed; it was an old discussion. Most soulmates were romantic partners, but it wasn't unheard of for people like them; soulmates who were just friends, or even relatives. Steve knew it, too - there was a sweet old lady in the next apartment house over who was soulmates with her female cousin. The two had never married, but had raised a couple orphans they'd adopted. "I've met some others who've already found their Someone--"

"They weren't like us though, Bucky," Steve interjected, "they were swingers."

Bucky rolled his eyes, but bit his tongue on the angry words that wanted to come out. Steve was under a lot of stress right now, and he was not going to add to that. "So what're you gonna do tonight?"

Steve's brows furrowed together, glancing down. "I was gonna go visit Ma." He looked up quickly and shook his head, interjecting before Bucky could hardly do more than open his mouth, "An' no, you don't gotta come with me. I'm just gonna sit with her for a while. She'll prob'ly sleep the whole time, anyway." He hoped she did, at least; she was in a lot of pain these days, always coughing.

Sighing, Bucky acquiesced. A few more words to figure out their plans for later, and Bucky left, for one of the dances frequently held on weekends that doubled as "meet-n-greets" for people hoping to find their soulmate. Steve had gone to a few, just to be social, but no one was ever that interested in him, so mostly he propped up the wall while Bucky flitted around like a damn social butterfly.

They were such opposites in so many ways, Steve mused as he walked down the street toward the hospital, and yet they complemented each other so well. He knew that was the whole point of soulmates, but he could never stop thinking how incredibly lucky he was to have met Bucky when they were children, before pre-conceived notions had been crammed into their heads, and the rest of the world's problems and issues had become their own. No way would someone like Bucky now, ever glance twice at short, scrawny, chronically sick Steve Rogers. If Steve would even have made it to young adulthood without the bond between soulmates that helped make you stronger.

People with found soulmates could die, of course, and did - his own Da had been killed in the Great War, and his Ma had survived it. But once you'd found your soulmate, it was a lot harder for you to succumb to illness and disease, and you healed faster than otherwise. He'd read an article once talking about potentially the synergistic bond between the very cells of a soulmate, boosting each other's immune system, or something like that.

There was a florist shop just down the block from the hospital - probably did a lot of business with visiting family, Steve thought, only a little bitterly - and he jiggled his wallet in his trouser pocket in contemplation. Ma might be sleeping now, but even if she was, it'd be a nice surprise for her to wake up to fresh flowers. It'd play hell on his allergies, but he'd only be carrying them for about 10 minutes, so it wouldn't be all that bad. Nodding decisively, he stepped into the shop.

It was bright and cheery inside the store, with warm yellow lighting casting a golden glow over the gleaming hardwood counters; ribbons and strings in a myriad of colors seemed to explode out of display stands, and dozens of pre-made bouquets were on every available surface. Steve's fingers started itching for his pencil and sketchbook - there was so much detail in the little shop; not actually so little, but made cozy with the sheer volume of product vying for space.

He picked a ready-made bouquet of baby's breath and orchids, his mother's favorite (she said it reminded her of the flowers back home), and went up to the cash register to pay for it.

Comments

[theycalledmeacurse]

It was a polite way of not stepping into potentially rocky territory, Marie knew, and she didn't hold it against him. Religion was a touchy subject for many, and her own mother had been a staunch advocate of avoiding the subject with most company, even her older sister. Marie had just never been very passionate about it or overly concerned about following the strict rules of the church -- her father could be credited for that mindset.

"Thank you," she murmured, stepping inside before glancing over her shoulder at Steve. "Don't worry, sugar, I won't argue religion with you. You have your beliefs and I respect that." And then she turned and took in the clean but lived in space, noting the signs of bachelor life that had settled in, along with the hints of a woman having lived there. There were also...

"You're an artist?" she asked in surprised curiosity, moving further into the room to pick up one of the pencils that had been left lying around.

[mini_steve]

It wasn't what he'd expected her to say, when Marie got her first look at his place. Steve rubbed his neck, glancing around. He was tidy by default, so it wasn't some horrible pigsty in his apartment - but he was also rather absentminded when it came to mundane chores, easily distracted and always coming up with new ideas he wanted to jot down right away, before he forgot them.

"Oh, yeah," he responded, a little distractedly, grabbing the broom stick tucked in a spot beside the front door. "I was in art school for a while. Had to drop out when ma got sick, but at least it gave me some experience. I've been buildin' up my portfolio, tryin' ta get into comics. I helped with a few murals and things for the WPA. Uh, don't be startled," he told her, before lifting the broom handle up and rapping sharply three times on the ceiling. A few seconds later there were two corresponding thuds from above, as if someone were stomping on the floor.

"It's-- Bucky lives upstairs, it's an easy way to let the other know we're around, that kinda thing. We could do Morse code, except Bucky can't spell for sh-- anything." He caught himself just in time, before swearing in front of Marie.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Marie was a bit surprised at the sudden thumping on the ceiling and the answer that came so quickly after. They really were close, she realized. Best friends, brothers, soulmates. Whatever label you put on them, they came as a set, and she was suddenly extremely nervous about meeting Bucky.

She did manage an unsteady chuckle at Steve's almost swearing, finding his gentlemanly ways to be absolutely adorable because they were so genuine. She might be just getting to know him, but she could tell that it was a part of him. His mother had raised him well.

His mother... She hadn't known the woman was sick. It made sense why Steve had been in that part of town, so close to the hospital, and why his mother wasn't currently living with him. Was it serious? Would she... No, now was not the time to remember her own mother and get emotional.

[mini_steve]

Steve set the broom back in its place, suddenly even more nervous than he had been at the thought of Marie and Bucky meeting. Before it had seemed more abstract, an 'of course they're going to meet' sort of idea; but now Bucky was on his way down, and it was steadily approaching and inevitable. He wondered suddenly if they should've done this somewhere else. This was his turf, and by extension Bucky's, which put Marie at a disadvantage, which wasn't at all fair to her.

Glancing around, he thought about offering her a seat - but he kinda thought she'd be too polite to take it, and it would probably be better if she were standing when Bucky showed up, anyway. She'd want to stand to greet him, and just-- Steve didn't know, it just seemed like a good idea if she were standing. Still, he wanted to be a good host: she'd literally followed a virtual stranger to his home, regardless of the fact they were soulmates. "D'you want somethin' ta drink?" he asked.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Everything was happening so quickly that Marie was fairly certain her head was about to start spinning. Meeting her soulmate, following him to his home to meet his other soulmate... It suddenly felt like too much too soon, but there was nothing to be done for it now.

She glanced over at Steve, blinking for a moment in confusion before slightly shaking her head. "No, thank you, sugar," she murmured before turning her eyes down to her hands - she was still holding the pencil. Setting it back down where it had been, she folded her hands together in front of her and straightened her back a little. It would have been nice to have a drink to hold in her hands, but she'd probably just end up spilling it with the way her nerves were right then.

[mini_steve]

Steve wanted to take her hand, because he could see that she was nervous, but he didn't know if she'd accept the gesture. Maybe she would. But then it might give Bucky the wrong idea when he came in, and that wasn't--

The front door swung open, and Bucky walked in. His usual swagger was gone, and instead he looked concerned. Steve had been preoccupied with worrying about Marie, but now he could feel Bucky's worry through their bond.

Bucky stopped a couple steps in past the door, glancing over at Marie in surprise. Steve found himself straightening to his fullest height, lifting his chin with a confidence he didn't quite feel. He was suddenly realizing he had no idea what to say. He hadn't had any time to go over his words, consider the consequence of what he said, and more importantly, how he said it.

"Hey, Buck. So...this is Marie. Marie, this is Bucky. Uh, we... we met earlier tonight, when I went to buy some flowers for Ma."

The look Bucky gave him said he knew something was going on, but he hadn't quite parsed out what yet. Still, he didn't seem agitated, and reached out to shake Marie's hand in greeting. He even flashed his typical debonair smile at her. "A pleasure, miss."

[theycalledmeacurse]

She would have gladly taken Steve's hand for support, but it probably wouldn't have been the best way to meet his other soulmate. She wasn't there to replace Bucky, Steve wasn't trading in for a newer, different model and she didn't want to give that impression. And then suddenly Bucky was there, looking surprised and a bit worried with that handsome face that she bet made him a hit with the ladies.

The smile he gave her was charming and she didn't hesitate to reach out to set her hand in his... But then she couldn't breathe because of the feeling that swept over her, the same sort of one when she'd first touched Steve.

Two. She had two as well, and the three of them...

Pulling her hand back quickly, she shook her head and stepped back, looking as lost and overwhelmed as she felt while she turned and started for the couch. "Excuse me, I need to sit down," she murmured, half-falling down onto the edge of the seat. Sure enough, when she pulled up her sleeve again, there was another mark nestled just behind the one she'd gotten earlier.

[mini_steve]

Holding his breath as they shook hands, Steve was about to sigh in relief that so far, everything seemed to be going smoothly--

Then he saw Bucky's face go slack, his eyes widening in surprise, and he jerked back slightly, at the same time Marie pulled her hand back. Steve could feel his heartbeat pick up and his breath quicken in panic - except he wasn't panicking, because he didn't know what was going on! Still concerned about Marie, his head whipped around to look at Bucky, who had to be the source of the panic.

Bucky, who'd undone his shirt cuff and pushed it up to his elbow... revealing a slowly-darkening mark on the middle of his forearm. He watched as Bucky looked at him, and was confused for a moment at the look of almost despair on Bucky's face. Why was Bucky upset? It wasn't as if Marie were replacing either one of them, this might actually--

Oh. Oh. Bucky still didn't know that he and Marie were also soulmates. And for Buck, he probably figured Steve would do something noble and step out of the way for them to-- well, do what most soulmates did.

This exchange of looks and flash of understanding happened in only a couple of seconds. It actually made Steve feel better about the whole thing, on more equal footing. He always seemed to do better when he had a problem to solve, or someone else to help out. Rolling his eyes, he told Bucky, "you're an idiot," and pushed up his own sleeve, revealing his own mark from Marie.

Jerking his head toward the chair by the couch, Steve moved over and flopped down beside Marie, who was staring at her - now doubled - soul marks. In an unconscious move he never would have tried if he'd actually thought of it beforehand, Steve draped his arm over the back of the couch, behind Marie. Not quite around her shoulders, but it was still a somewhat proprietary gesture. It felt natural to try and be a little closer to her; just like he and Bucky were always sharing friendly, casual touches, his body recognized Marie as someone he shared a bond with, even if his brain and his propriety hadn't quite caught up yet.

"Like I was about to say," Steve said, in a tone of voice that implied before you went and screwed everything up, "I met Marie earlier tonight, and turns out, we're soulmates. Thanks for stealing my thunder." His hand moved off the back of the couch and onto Marie's shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze.

Bucky glared at him. "You're such a punk," he gave his typical response, but it was lacking any real heat, still sounding weak from the surprise.

[theycalledmeacurse]

It was good that Steve came over to sit beside her; she needed someone to anchor her while she felt like she was being washed out to sea. She pressed a hand to her mouth, still staring down at those two marks, and only looked away from them when a hand came to rest on her shoulder.

Her hands dropping back into her lap, she glanced over at Steve and then to Bucky and back. "I don't know what to say," she offered quietly, sounding exactly like someone whose entire world had just been turned upside down. Because it had.

She had suddenly, all out of nowhere, been shoved into their lives and now they were supposed to... what? Get to know each other? Make room for her in their lives? She was an outsider who they knew nothing about. When it had just been Steve, it had seemed almost doable, but now with the two of them the entire thing was daunting and entirely overwhelming.

[mini_steve]

Because Steve was a gentleman, and precisely because he knew (at least to an extent) how Marie was feeing, he did not say 'now you know how I felt.' (If it had been Bucky, he would've said it without hesitation; but with Bucky, he knew Steve was only teasing.) So instead, he wrapped his arm fully around Marie's shoulders, pulling her a little against his side. "Sorry this all got sprung on you so fast. It's pretty overwhelming."

He glanced over at Bucky, who was watching the two of them with a closed expression. He didn't seem upset though. Almost... calculating. Contemplating the repercussions of the whole situation. Steve had a head for strategy, but Bucky was no slouch himself, and was better at it even than Steve, at least when it came to interpersonal relationships, just by dent of more experience. He understood people, and their motivations, better than Steve ever had, for some reason. Steve had even complained on occasion that he didn't understand why people acted a certain way or other; Bucky's response had always equated to 'I know you don't. That's what makes you special.' Which explained absolutely nothing, but at least he said it affectionately, and never condescendingly.

Steve widened his eyes at his friend, a clear expression of 'well? are you going to help or what?'

Bucky gave a sigh, leaning forward in his chair so he was marginally closer to Marie. "This doesn't really change anything, ya know," he said quietly. "I mean yeah, two soulmates is kinda rare, and a whole... triangle thing is really rare. But Stevie and me, if he didn't tell ya - we kinda come as a set anyway. So, the thing is... this doesn't really change much, or it doesn't have to. Me, and Steve, we've never had to look for a soulmate. We didn't grow up wondering and imagining what this whole encounter would be like, or what might happen afterward. So, this is your chance to let us know what you want to happen. It's up to you. You wanna get to know us for a little bit, that's fine. If you wanna head home and wrap your head around it for a while, that's fine, too. Or something else. Just let us know."

Steve relaxed as Bucky spoke, saying the words that had been circling around in his brain since he'd first touched Marie, but hadn't had any clue how to say.

[theycalledmeacurse]

What she wanted to have happen -- that was the big question, wasn't it. What was she looking for out of all of this? What did she want from them, to give to them? Did she need time to digest all of this before delving into things?

Leaning against Steve, she took a deep breath that she held for a few seconds before letting it out slowly. It helped, if only just a little.

"I don't want this to cause any problems for either of you," she finally started, her voice shaking a bit with nerves. "I know it's all unexpected, especially for it to be like this, but I... I'd like for us to at least be friends. I don't really... have anyone else, and I didn't think I would for a long time."

[mini_steve]

Steve nodded along in agreement as Marie spoke, while Bucky just continued to watch her, face unreadable. It always unnerved Steve a little when he saw Bucky with that look; like all of his other expressions were just masks, hiding his real thoughts beneath the surface, and this was what he always felt like. Steve knew that wasn't true, but it always made him a little uneasy, nonetheless.

Probably sensing at least part of that, Bucky's eyes flicked away from Marie to look at him. It took another second, but finally his face softened, and Bucky leaned back a little to recline in the soft armchair. He made a show of propping his elbow on the arm, and resting his chin in his hand, one leg crossing over the other, the supreme picture of comfort and ease.

"Can't guarantee there won't be a few bumps in the road," Bucky said, chin still resting on his palm, "but that's what makes life interesting, anyway. Friends is definitely doable, and we don't really have anybody else, either. Well," he rolled his eyes, shifting a little. "I got a whole passel of overbearing family, but we'll keep 'em off ya if that's what ya want. Ma's perfectly content to dote Steve to death."

Steve leaned a little closer to Marie to stage-whisper in her ear, "She's Italian. She thinks everything can be fixed with a mountain of food."

His words reminded him of what he wanted to discuss with Bucky... which he hadn't wanted to drag Marie into, despite being his soulmate; the whole thing was so new, he didn't want to burden her with that. He especially didn't want to now, with her being hit twice with something so huge in the span of a few hours - but now, she was Bucky's soulmate as well, and Bucky would end up telling her, he was sure.

Clearing his throat, he slid his hand along Marie's shoulders as he withdrew it, drawing into himself slightly and clasping his hands in his lap. "I gotta go back to the hospital for a bit," he told both of them. "The night nurses wanted to talk to me about somethin'."

Bucky's eyes sharpened at that, and Steve saw the moment Bucky caught on that he was lying. "No," he finally said.

"Buck--"

"I don' care, Steve. Whatever it is yer plannin' on doin', don't. Don't do it tonight."

Steve set his jaw and glared at Bucky, but was mortified when his eyes started tearing up.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Marie made a mental note to tell Steve about the fact that Southerners shared that mentality about problems being fixed by food. It was something she'd grown up with, and it was actually really comforting to know that she had something in common with Bucky's mother, who she really would like to meet sometime.

She turned slightly toward Steve when he withdrew into himself, frowning in concern as he started speaking, confirming her assumption that his mother was in the hospital. When the exchange happened with Bucky, though, she realized it was even worse than she'd thought, and her heart broke as she put the pieces together.

"Oh, sugar, I'm so sorry," she whispered, leaning in to wrap her arms around Steve in a firm hug, hoping he would accept it and let her offer him even a few moments of support. They may have just met, but she understood what he was going through more than he could possibly know.

[mini_steve]

Steve squeezed his eyes shut, making the tears pooling there spill down his cheeks, which he hastily wiped away. He hugged the arm Marie had wrapped around him, leaning against her, enjoying the support.

"She's been sick for a long time," he explained in a soft voice to Marie, but his eyes glanced over at Bucky as well. "She's not gonna get any better, an' I know that."

Bucky pursed his lips together, huffing angrily through his nose before glancing away. "They upped her morphine again, didn't they?"

Steve should've realized Bucky would piece it together quickly. He may not have been Steve's biological brother, but he'd grown up listening to Sarah talk about her job as much as Steve had. He knew what was happening to her, what would continue to happen. And that Steve wouldn't sit by when there was something he could do to help.

"I gotta--" his voice hitched. Clearing his throat, Steve tried again. "I gotta say goodbye. Come with me. She'll-- she'd like that."

There was a pause that felt like it lasted forever, but finally Bucky nodded. Steve turned to Marie. "She's not... sometimes she wakes up, but she's not really there anymore. You wouldn't really get to meet her. If you don't wanna come with, I wouldn't blame you. But...I mean, it's up to you. Otherwise I can walk you home on the way there, there's no rush for me to get there."

[theycalledmeacurse]

Lord, it was just like it had been with her own mother. Years of watching her mother suffer, never getting any better despite the treatments the doctors tried, and those final months of her wasting away... The memories still haunted her. If Marie had been able to do something to help ease that suffering, would she have?

The answer was easy. Yes.

Lifting a hand to Steve's jaw, she gave him a sad, gentle smile. "My mother was ill for many years, I know how hard this is. So I'd like to go with you if you'll let me, Steve. Because I care about you."

Because she cared and because she knew that this wouldn't be easy for Bucky, either. If he and Steve had been friends for so many years, then Steve's mother likely meant a great deal to him as well, and she wanted to be there for them both in their time of need.

[mini_steve]

Steve nodded, feeling so grateful it made him lightheaded. Not just because of the extra support Marie was willing to provide, despite barely knowing him, being part of his life for only a few hours - but the fact that his soulmate understood what he was going through. Bucky obviously didn't, since his parents were both still alive and healthy. He felt a little guilty, being glad that Marie had also gone through this horrible situation, but it wasn't that uncommon, and God had a hand in everything. Steve wondered if He, or some power in the universe, had orchestrated it so that he would meet Marie on this night specifically, so that he'd have someone sympathetic to bolster him through this hard choice.

Those thoughts flitted through his mind, but he didn't let them linger. Instead, he took Marie's hand. "Thank you," he murmured; he couldn't look up at her, overwhelmed and embarrassed at how grateful he felt to her.

Swallowing, he made a show of clearing his throat and checking his watch. "The day nurses should be gone by now. I wanna get back in time to talk to night shift early." He needed them to hold her next dose of morphine, so they could administer it with the following dose at the end of their shift; it would be enough for an overdose, and it would still match their records of how much they were prescribed to use, if anyone went to check. And he had to say goodbye, even if he wasn't sure she'd be able to hear him.

Bucky heaved a big breath, and nodded, glancing over at Marie. "Okay. Let's get going, then."

[theycalledmeacurse]

It was turning into one whirlwind of a night, with so many unexpected situations arising that had sent her head spinning. With this, at least, she had something to focus on: taking care of Steve and Bucky. She set about doing so by hooking an arm around Steve and urging him to stand, giving him support and direction without making him seem like an invalid.

She didn't say anything to either of the men, because she simply couldn't think of what else there might be to say. This was an ending in their lives, not her own, and she was just there to be with them for it. She would follow their lead in all things.

[mini_steve]

It was a silent walk back to the hospital, but at least this time Steve wasn't making it alone. He waved Marie and Bucky back while he went to talk to Ardith at the nurse's station. She was older, and always sympathetic to him, and he knew she'd understand what he was asking.

He spoke with her for only a few minutes, before she was nodding and waving them toward the room. Steve bit his lip and glanced at Marie. "You don't - have to come in, if you don't want. I just wanna say a few words to her, that's all." He wanted to say goodbye. Bucky was coming in with him, for support, and to say his own goodbye, as she'd been as much his own mother as Steve's. But Steve didn't want Marie to be uncomfortable, listening to his last words to his mother, a woman she'd never get the chance to really meet.

He was probably selfish in kind of hoping she'd want to go in, though. But he'd understand if she wanted to stay outside in the hall.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Marie stayed close to Bucky while Steve spoke with the nurse, trying her best to offer support wherever she possibly could. She was still feeling out the situation they had been tossed into by fate, but she knew that she cared about these two men and that was what mattered at the moment.

"Of course I'll come in, sugar," she assured Steve softly, reaching out to carefully take his hand in her own to give it a gentle squeeze. "I'm not letting the two of you do this on your own." She may not know Steve's mother, but she knew the grief that the two of them were about to experience. If she could help them get through that, even just a little bit, then she would.

[mini_steve]

Steve took a slow, deep breath, trying to give Marie a smile. He wasn't sure how well it came out, but he figured it was the thought that counted. Bucky clapped him on the shoulder and jostled him a little bit in support, and Steve nodded. He had to do this, and it was time.

The room was dim, but Steve knew the layout and moved confidently over to his mother's bed, leading the other two behind him. "Hey, Ma," he greeted quietly. "I know I was just here. I brought Bucky with me this time."

Steve had barely had a chance to glance at Bucky before his best friend was leaning forward slightly. "Hey, Mrs. Rogers."

Her eyes stayed closed, but Sarah Rogers took a slightly deeper breath, and Steve felt her fingers shift in his hand where he was holding them. "I also... I didn't tell you before, 'cause I was kinda in shock, but uh... I found a soulmate. I know - another one," he joked. "She's Bucky's soulmate, too. But I found her first. So I'm officially the leader of a gang, now."

"Ahh, come on, pal," Bucky groaned, making Steve grin at him. It had been a joke since they were teens that they were gonna start an Irish-Italian gang, and make the whole neighborhood fear them.

"Marie's from the South," Steve continued, "so we got all our bases covered. The O'Reillys' don't stand a chance."

"Don' worry, Mrs. Rogers," Bucky interrupted. "I'm keepin' a close eye on him. I won' let Stevie here get into any trouble. I-- I promise." It was more than just a continuation of the joke - Bucky was telling her he'd watch after Steve, now that she couldn't anymore. Nobody could really keep Steve out of trouble, but Bucky and Sarah had always been the ones to curb him the most, throughout the years.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Anyone who didn't know them would hardly be able to tell that the boys were having a hard time with this. Marie might not really know them, not yet, but she knew enough, and she could feel that aching of grief that was beginning to wrap around their chests. It was a feeling she knew intimately from when her own mother had passed, and later her father. It wasn't something she would have wished on anyone, but it was something that they all had to face eventually.

Moving closer to the bed, Marie leaned in to gently set a hand on Sarah's arm, another up on her shoulder. She didn't know if the woman could hear her, hadn't known with her mother either, but that wasn't going to stop her from making the promise she owed the other woman. "Bucky won't be the only one looking out for your son, Mrs. Rogers," she said in her soothing southern drawl. "I'm gonna be there for both of them. We're family now, and I'm gonna take care of them for you, I promise, no matter how hard they make it."

Bending down, she pressed a soft kiss to the other woman's cheek before stepping back again, staying out of the way so they could finish their goodbyes.

[mini_steve]

Steve took a deep breath, watching Marie. This...was really happening, wasn't it? He knew what was coming, had been prepared for it... but it still hurt, an ache in his chest like an asthma attack and heartburn and heartache.

Leaning forward a little more, he was almost whispering as he told her, "I wanted to say thank you. I know you did the best you could, and I couldn't have asked for a better mother. If it weren't for you... Well. I'd probably be dead right now, honestly. An' I woulda been a lot less happy, if I'd lived. I love you, so much." Steve squeezed his eyes shut tight, tilting his head to wipe the moisture leaking from them onto his shirt sleeve.

Bucky knelt down on the linoleum, placing his hand over Steve's on top of Sarah's. "I always think of you as my own ma, you know?" he said softly. "Except better, 'cause mine's always yellin' at me. Thank you, fer always takin' care of me, and... thank you for yer son. He's a pain in my ass, but you raised 'im right. He's gonna make you proud, more proud. I'll look after him," he finished in a whisper.

Steve sniffed, but didn't contradict Bucky with his usual 'I don't need lookin' after.' Now wasn't the time.

"We're gonna go now, Ma. I just... I'll see you later, okay? I'll be fine, and we'll see you later." Because he would. Not for a while, and not on earth, but Steve believed whole-heartedly in heaven, and he knew his mother would be looking down on him.

He felt her fingers squeeze his one last time, before consciously releasing his hand, her face screwed up in a slight grimace as her breath wheezed.

Steve shook his head and stood up, turning away from her. "I wanna go home now," he announced quietly.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Marie moved forward at his words, instinctively swooping in to do just as she'd promised his mother just minutes earlier - take care of him. Slipping an arm around his back, she set her other hand on his shoulder, offering him support and closeness for as long as he'd let her. It felt natural to touch him, to give him those things as much as she could, and she didn't question it for a second.

"Okay, sugar, we'll get you home," she murmured to him before glancing over at Bucky, checking on the other member of their strange little triumvirate. He was losing someone he loved as well, and she wondered for a moment how she was going to manage to see the both of them through this.

[mini_steve]

Steve leaned into the comforting touch, only peripherally aware that it wasn't Bucky's customary solid arm around his shoulders. His best friend quickly stepped up to his usual place at Steve's side though, and bracketed between them, they left the hospital room. Steve ducked his head as they passed the nurse's station, unable to look at the nurse, whom he knew, before the night was over, would be a merciful angel of death for his mother, at his urging.

Jesus. He'd killed her, he was killing his own mother, the woman who had raised him, encouraged him when all he'd wanted to do was give up. He hadn't been exaggerating when he'd said he'd probably be dead if it weren't for her; not only had she nursed him when he was sick for the majority of his life, but she'd been the reason he'd made himself keep going, when the weight of society's hatred of him had weighed him down. If it hadn't been for her and Bucky, he would've given in to depression years ago, and probably killed himself, if some random bug hadn't done it to him first.

They were just outside the hospital when Steve couldn't hold it in any longer. With a wet, gasping breath, he started sobbing.

Bucky froze, unsure what to do. He was grieving for Sarah, but no matter what he said about considering her his own mother, it just wasn't the same as what Steve was going through. He couldn't even imagine, and he didn't know how to comfort his usually stoic, steadfast best friend.

[theycalledmeacurse]

If Marie had known what Steve was thinking, she'd have insisted that he was doing the right thing, that his mother would surely have understood and thanked him for making that terribly difficult decision. What she had now wasn't life, it was prolonged dying and no one deserved that sort of suffering.

But she didn't know anything of what he was thinking, or Bucky, but she still sprang into action when Steve suddenly broke down in tears. "Come on, sugar, let's sit you down," she murmured to him, looking over at Bucky and catching his eye before nodding toward a bench just a few feet down the way. If they got him seated so he could really let it out, then she'd wrap him up in her arms for as long as he needed and hold him as tightly as she could without hurting him.