Soulmates Through Time

[mini_steve]

"Not tonight, Buck," Steve said, unable to hide the weariness in his voice. He shuffled some papers on his desk, tidying up, and pointedly not looking at his friend.

Bucky sighed, tilting his head as he watched Steve, his mouth pulling down to the side unhappily. "You gotta get out there more, Stevie," he tried coaxing. "You'll never find--"

"I got you, don't I?" Steve's brows drew together in upset, but he still didn't look over at Bucky.

The two had known each other since they were little, and as soon as they'd shaken hands upon first meeting - imitating how they'd seen their parents do so - they'd stared at each other, wide-eyed, just knowing that they'd spend their lives together. They'd never questioned it, even though at the time they hadn't really understood the idea of 'soulmates', besides hearing snippets of adult conversations that mostly went over their heads.

Steve had asked his mother about it, several months later. When she'd described the utter feeling of rightness, of knowing this one, single person would always understand and be there for you, supporting you, but also pushing you to be your best... Steve had nodded, and with all the gravity of a five-year-old, had told his mother that Bucky was that for him.

Unlike how most mothers probably would've reacted to the precocious statement, brushing it off as a child enjoying having a new best friend, his mother had stilled and become quiet, looking at him for long moments. "Is he really, baby?" She'd finally questioned, in her sing-song Irish lilt. Steve hadn't been able to take his eyes off her, even as he nodded, willing her to believe him.

Sarah had bundled him up close, kissed his forehead, and just held him in her lap (he really was too old to be held like that, but he still fit, and he liked it, so he never complained). "I'm glad, Steve. I'm so glad you found your Someone so soon."

Now, Steve finally turned to look at Bucky. "Why're you still even goin' ta those things? They're for people looking for their soulmates." He rubbed his right palm heel with his opposite thumb, almost looking like he was massaging a cramp; it was a nervous, comforting gesture he always did, but especially when discussing anything concerning soulmates. Right over the odd oblong shape at the base of his hand, that matched Bucky's. Their soulmarks. Steve had never seen one so low on anyone else's arm; usually they were higher, denoting how old the person was when they'd first touched their soulmate, and found their Someone.

"Some people just like havin' a good time, Steve," Bucky sighed; it was an old discussion. Most soulmates were romantic partners, but it wasn't unheard of for people like them; soulmates who were just friends, or even relatives. Steve knew it, too - there was a sweet old lady in the next apartment house over who was soulmates with her female cousin. The two had never married, but had raised a couple orphans they'd adopted. "I've met some others who've already found their Someone--"

"They weren't like us though, Bucky," Steve interjected, "they were swingers."

Bucky rolled his eyes, but bit his tongue on the angry words that wanted to come out. Steve was under a lot of stress right now, and he was not going to add to that. "So what're you gonna do tonight?"

Steve's brows furrowed together, glancing down. "I was gonna go visit Ma." He looked up quickly and shook his head, interjecting before Bucky could hardly do more than open his mouth, "An' no, you don't gotta come with me. I'm just gonna sit with her for a while. She'll prob'ly sleep the whole time, anyway." He hoped she did, at least; she was in a lot of pain these days, always coughing.

Sighing, Bucky acquiesced. A few more words to figure out their plans for later, and Bucky left, for one of the dances frequently held on weekends that doubled as "meet-n-greets" for people hoping to find their soulmate. Steve had gone to a few, just to be social, but no one was ever that interested in him, so mostly he propped up the wall while Bucky flitted around like a damn social butterfly.

They were such opposites in so many ways, Steve mused as he walked down the street toward the hospital, and yet they complemented each other so well. He knew that was the whole point of soulmates, but he could never stop thinking how incredibly lucky he was to have met Bucky when they were children, before pre-conceived notions had been crammed into their heads, and the rest of the world's problems and issues had become their own. No way would someone like Bucky now, ever glance twice at short, scrawny, chronically sick Steve Rogers. If Steve would even have made it to young adulthood without the bond between soulmates that helped make you stronger.

People with found soulmates could die, of course, and did - his own Da had been killed in the Great War, and his Ma had survived it. But once you'd found your soulmate, it was a lot harder for you to succumb to illness and disease, and you healed faster than otherwise. He'd read an article once talking about potentially the synergistic bond between the very cells of a soulmate, boosting each other's immune system, or something like that.

There was a florist shop just down the block from the hospital - probably did a lot of business with visiting family, Steve thought, only a little bitterly - and he jiggled his wallet in his trouser pocket in contemplation. Ma might be sleeping now, but even if she was, it'd be a nice surprise for her to wake up to fresh flowers. It'd play hell on his allergies, but he'd only be carrying them for about 10 minutes, so it wouldn't be all that bad. Nodding decisively, he stepped into the shop.

It was bright and cheery inside the store, with warm yellow lighting casting a golden glow over the gleaming hardwood counters; ribbons and strings in a myriad of colors seemed to explode out of display stands, and dozens of pre-made bouquets were on every available surface. Steve's fingers started itching for his pencil and sketchbook - there was so much detail in the little shop; not actually so little, but made cozy with the sheer volume of product vying for space.

He picked a ready-made bouquet of baby's breath and orchids, his mother's favorite (she said it reminded her of the flowers back home), and went up to the cash register to pay for it.

Comments

[theycalledmeacurse]

Marie had never been the sort to look down on others, despite growing up in possibly the most prejudiced part of the country. She'd always felt that people deserved to be treated as just that--people. And while she hadn't always been able to voice her opinions when she'd lived in the deep south, now that she was in New York... Well, she wasn't some timid butterfly anymore, and she wasn't chatting with him just for the sale.

He seemed like a nice guy. Over the years, Marie had gotten pretty good at reading people, and everything she saw about this particular young man said that he was an innocent, and the fact that he was buying flowers for his mother spoke volumes.

"Some," she admitted with a slightly embarrassed smile. "I'm still learning. Mrs. Patterson, the owner, has been teaching me, but I think I still have a long way to go." Glancing from the bouquet to the ribbons she'd just brought out, she picked up one in a rich pink color and asked, "How about a ribbon for around the stems? It's no extra charge." It normally would be, but he didn't look the sort to have the money for quite so many frivolous expenses, and she did have the bit of coin to spare this once.

[mini_steve]

Looking at the ribbon she held out, Steve quickly debated. He was pretty sure it wasn't no extra charge, because everything cost something these days - which meant she was doing him a favor. He didn't like charity, because he could take care of things on his own; he always wanted to prove that he wasn't a 'drain on society'. On the other hand... He looked at the bouquet. It was completely frivolous to be buying his mother flowers, but he knew it would make her happy. And if the shop girl was willing to do that for him, a complete stranger...

Steve gave a decisive nod and smiled. "That would be great. Thanks." He put the barest emphasis on the thanks; he didn't want to draw attention to the fact that he realized what she was doing, but he wanted her to know he appreciated it.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Marie didn't see any charity in her act, simply a way of helping someone make their gift even more perfect. There were so many reasons he might be giving a bouquet to his mother - a birthday, congratulations for an achievement, a wish for better health. Whatever the reason was, she knew the extra detail would be noticed and appreciated.

"It's my pleasure, sir," she assured him softly with a warm smile before reaching out to take the bouquet from him. It would be easier to wrap the ribbon and tie it around the stems if it were laying on the counter. She wasn't as vigilant as she might normally be, and her fingertips brushed against his. It was just for a moment, but...

[mini_steve]

Steve never had an issue like some others with touching people - he'd already found his soulmate, so it didn't ever occur to him to be careful as he held the bouquet out for her reaching hand. "Please, call--"

And then he felt it. As soon as their skin touched, that surge of rightness; he'd never forget that feeling, even though he'd been barely five when he'd first felt it. Steve couldn't stop the quick, in-drawn breath, even as his eyes flew up to hers. His brows drew together in shock and confusion. This - this wasn't right. Bucky was his soulmate! He'd never gone out looking because he already had his Someone, there shouldn't be anyone else!

And yet, he couldn't deny that there was no other explanation for what he'd just felt when he touched the shop girl.

[theycalledmeacurse]

It was an automatic reaction to avoid touching someone without their permission,rather than bring a result of the result of actively looking or not looking for her Someone. Such a thing didn't occur to her, and so it was a complete surprise when she felt that rightness rush through her, just the way her mother had described it all those years ago.

Marie stared at the man across the counter, confusion written across her expression. Her mouth opened to say something, but the words wouldn't come out. Taking a shallow breath, she set the flowers down and took hold of the ribbon to finish her work, though her hands shook slightly.

This was not how she'd expected her day to go.

[mini_steve]

This isn't right. That's all Steve could think, as the woman took the flowers from his now-lax hand and began shakily applying the ribbon.

Unable to stop watching her, Steve began unbuttoning the cuff of his right shirt sleeve. He had to check, had to make sure...

His fingers curled in when he glanced down and caught sight of his soulmark with Bucky at the base of his palm. It was familiar to him, something he rarely thought about anymore. But then he pushed up his sleeve, and there it was - a new mark, not quite halfway up his forearm. It was lighter than the other one, but Steve imagined he could see it darkening even as he watched.

"This can't be right..." he whispered to himself, unaware that he was even speaking out loud.

[theycalledmeacurse]

In her head, Marie was cursing like a sailor, berating herself for being so weak as to avoid dealing with the situation that she was allowing herself to complete a shabby bow around the flowers. This wasn't her--she was better than this.

The ribbon was tugged loose again before she looked up, catching sight of the mark on his arm. Marks. Two of them. "It's not unheard of," she remarked quietly, her southern drawl thickening a little with her emotions running high. "My aunt has two..." It felt like too simple a response when he was clearly struggling with their present situation.

Deep breath. Pushing up her own long sleeve, she saw the mark on her arm that hadn't been there before, a match to his in shading. This was really happening and they had to face it. Holding out her hand for him, she introduced herself. "My name's Marie."

[mini_steve]

"W'll I've never heard of it," Steve muttered to himself, not caring that he sounded like he was sulking. He imagined what Bucky would say to the news. Bucky would be ecstatic, overjoyed that Steve had found a girl, someone a little more socially accepted as a soulmate - and proof that Steve wasn't defective, or abandoned by God, or any of the other things people said about people like him.

Seeing the mark on her arm made it hit home for Steve - this wasn't just about him. He didn't know anything about this dame; did she even want to find her soulmate yet? Was she happy the way things were for her, or was she hoping her soulmate could make life better? He was actually kinda hoping for the former, otherwise she'd be sorely disappointed; he wasn't the guy to make life better for anyone.

Taking a deep breath, Steve took her hand, and gave her a smile; strained, but genuine. "Steve. Nice to meet you?"

[theycalledmeacurse]

The way he muttered like that almost had her worrying about things that were ridiculous; of course he was surprised by this, anyone would be, and he clearly hadn't been expecting to have another soulmate out there in the world. It was strange that his first mark was from so early in life, but she was sure there was a story behind it. If his soulmate was still around, though... what would they think of this? Would she fit at all in their world?

As the idea began to settle, Marie thought about how her life would change now that Steve was in it. She didn't exactly need a man to save her, but... well, she was lonely. None of her friends still in this part of the city were what she would consider close, and her family was gone. At least now, perhaps, she wouldn't be so alone.

"It is," she agreed with her genuine smile. "It's very nice to meet you, Steve." And then she laughed a little, letting go of his hand and shaking her head slightly as she easily retied the ribbon into a perfectly formed bow. "I don't think either of us were expecting this, but at least we're in it together, right?"

[mini_steve]

Steve found himself giving a lopsided smile. He did like her optimism, at least. "Yeah. Guess we are."

She was pretty, too, he found himself noticing. And then felt his face heat up as he realized just what he was thinking. That wasn't - just because most soulmates ended up romantic partners, usually even married, didn't mean that's what she'd want from him. It never even crossed his mind that gals would be interested in him, despite what Bucky always insisted. But he'd be happy to have another close friend, someone around to talk to.

Glancing at his watch again, Steve grimaced. "I...gotta get going," he said reluctantly, feeling like the world's biggest cad. Who met their soulmate, and then immediately ran out on them? Apparently, he did. "Are you-- how-- how late are you working? I could walk you home, maybe?"

[theycalledmeacurse]

If friendship was all that came out of their new relationship, Marie would be more than happy. But where most people might automatically rule out any romantic entanglements because of Steve's appearance, she did no such thing. If he was as kind as she had first thought, then he had every chance of winning her heart, regardless of what the world thought of people who didn't fit into what they considered ideal. No, he wasn't that traditional sort of handsome, but he was charming in his own way, and his next words endeared him to her in a way that little else might have been able to.

"That would be really nice, it's been a long time since someone walked me home," she told him, her smile softening but still very much in place. "I'll be finished up in about two hours."

She didn't hold it against him that he was leaving so quickly. He'd been on the way to see his mother, who was obviously important to him, and she had to work regardless. That he was making an effort to see her afterward meant a great deal.

[mini_steve]

Steve nodded, the movement a little jerky in his nervousness. He liked that she was so nice about it, didn't seem upset that he couldn't devote his time right this minute to at least a little longer getting to know her. He'd seen girls act like that with guys (ie Bucky) even when they weren't soulmates. So he was glad Marie wasn't like that.

"Okay," he responded. "That's--that's perfect." He tried giving her a pleased smile, but was pretty sure it just came off as awkward. Which, to be fair, was kinda how he was feeling at the moment.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Marie hated women who thought the world revolved around them. She'd seen the girls she'd grown up with act like that and it irked her that they couldn't see past their own petty lives to realize there were more important things.

"I'll see you soon, then," she said with a nod, finding his awkwardness adorable more than anything else. It was far more endearing than off-putting, that was for certain. "I hope you have a good visit with your mother."

[mini_steve]

Steve opened his mouth, and was about half a second away from saying something to the effect of 'she'll probably be sleeping, hopefully', before he remembered that Marie knew nothing about his mother, or his own life. Now really wasn't the time to explain it to her, either - and if she'd just been another shopkeeper, concluding their business and being friendly, he wouldn't have thought anything of it.

But that wasn't the case, and he found himself... both anticipating and dreading having to explain his life to her. He wondered if other people periodically took stock of their lives, categorizing things so they'd have an easier time of explaining what was happening when they finally met their soulmate. Steve was beginning to realize that his life was even more different than he'd anticipated, because he'd never gone through the anxiety of wondering about his soulmate, what they might talk about and learn from each other - he'd always had that, or near enough that he figured it counted as 'always'.

He finally just nodded and gave another small smile, replying, "Yeah, yes. I hope so, too." He dipped his head, more a shallow bow than another nod, before deciding discretion was the better part of valor and just turning and exiting the shop, determinedly not looking back, even through the shop window, for just one more glance at Marie. His other soulmate.

"Only you, Rogers," he muttered darkly to himself, as he weaved through the foot traffic on the way to the hospital.

His mother was drifting in and out of sleep when he arrived, but didn't seem to be in too much pain. A quick glance at the chart at the foot of her bed told him why; they'd upped her morphine. Again. He'd been a nurse's son his whole life, he knew what that meant. They were making sure she was comfortable. He knew a couple of the nurses on the night shift, actually colleagues of his mom's before she grew ill and wasn't allowed to work in a hospital setting anymore. Maybe he should talk to them about...

Steve resolved to discuss the situation with Bucky. Which led him back to thinking about Marie, as he sat and held his mother's limp, but still warm hand, his fingers stretched out to feel her fluttering pulse. Would she want to be a part of this decision? If she disagreed with him... frankly, even being his soulmate, he just didn't know her - well, at all yet, and certainly not well enough that her opinion in the matter held any weight. Bucky's held weight - but Bucky also knew him well enough to know that if Steve decided something, there were few things that could change his mind.

Glancing at his watch, Steve realized visiting hours would be over pretty soon, as would Marie's shift. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to his mother's forehead, before gently placing her hand on her torso. He gathered his jacket and quietly made his way out of the ward, nodding to the nurse at the desk as he left.

[theycalledmeacurse]

It was a good thing that Mrs. Patterson had gone for the night or Marie would have gotten a stern scolding for the way her mind kept wandering after Steve had gone. Steve. Her soulmate. It was such a crazy thought, to know that her soulmate wasn't just out there, but had suddenly dropped into her life out of nowhere. Just walked into the shop to buy some flowers for his mother, just another day of average, normal life.

But what if their hands hadn't touched at that moment? What if they'd never seen each other again after that moment? New York was a big place after all. Even thought of it made her feel sick. They'd only just met, but that feeling of rightness, of belonging with someone, had settled into her quickly and deeply, and she was very much looking forward to seeing him again.

Things were right on schedule that night. No late customers, the till had evened out, and all her receipts were in proper order for the morning. She'd even gotten a head start on the next day's order. So when her time was up, she turned off the lights and stepped outside, locking the door behind her.

[mini_steve]

Steve's hands were stuffed in his pockets, his head down in typical New Yorker fashion as he headed back down the street from the hospital. Don't stop, don't make eye contact, stay vigilant but otherwise ignore everybody. Which wasn't hard for him tonight, as his thoughts were swirling and he couldn't grasp any one for more than a few minutes.

He glanced up finally as he neared the shop, and was surprised to spot Marie just locking up. He would've jogged up to her, but jogging really wasn't an option for him. He did try to subtly lengthen his strides to reach her a little quicker, though.

"Hey--hi," he corrected himself; it didn't really seem polite to greet a gal, let alone his soulmate, the way he'd greet an acquaintance on the street. "Umm... is there anything you need to do, still?"

It was suddenly being made very apparent to Steve that he'd never had occasion to walk a gal home before. He had no clue what to do, or what to say. He hoped Marie didn't decide she'd been landed with the worst soulmate ever.

[theycalledmeacurse]

The worst soulmate ever would have been someone cruel who felt she was more property than person. It was rare for a relationship to turn possessive to the point of violence, but it did happen. (Though perhaps more than anyone knew, since it likely wasn't the sort of thing to be discussed in public.) If her soulmate was someone who appreciated her as an independent person, with the right to thoughts and feelings of her own, then she would consider herself lucky.

"No, I'm all done for today," she assured him with a shake of her head before gesturing down the street. "I live a few blocks over, it's about fifteen minutes if I'm not in a hurry." Which she sometimes was if she ever overslept.

[mini_steve]

Steve nodded, absorbing the information. His brain, at least, was no slouch when it came to exerting itself - it had plenty of practice picking up the slack when his body just couldn't do the things he wanted it to. "O-okay," he stuttered, pulling up beside her and gesturing for her to go ahead. Then he wondered if he should offer his arm to her. Was this dating? It really was just polite to offer your arm to a lady, but the few times he'd had occasion to try, he'd been politely but summarily ignored.

He did sort of stick out his elbow, in case she wanted to walk on his arm (he wasn't holding his breath, though). "Are-- are you? In a hurry?" he asked hesitantly. She'd been working all day, after all, she probably just wanted to get home and get off her feet.

[theycalledmeacurse]

It was with a smile and not a second of hesitation that she slipped her hand into the crook of his arm. A polite and familiar gesture, but not too familiar. They might be soulmates, but they had only just met.

"Not unless you have somewhere else to be, sugar," she informed him brightly, leaving him an opening just in case he did have another engagement. "With things as they are, I'd like to get to know you. Might as well start tonight."

[mini_steve]

...Oh. Huh. Steve's mind blanked for a few seconds, completely thrown for a loop at her willingness, and apparent want, to get to know him better. He had to keep reminding himself that Marie wasn't just another girl he'd met, or set up on a date, but his soulmate. It made things different.

"Oh...I mean, no! No, I don't really... actually..." Steve chewed on his bottom lip, glancing over at her. "So, I just had a thought. And, feel free to say no, I'll completely understand... but, umm... would you wanna go back to my place? Not!" He interrupted himself almost right away, realizing, slightly too late, how that would sound. "Not like--that! It's just, my-- my other soulmate," he reached up to rub at his eyebrow in an unconscious awkward motion, "Bucky, he lives upstairs. I-- he's..."

Steve sighed. "Honestly? He's a lot better at talkin' ta people. I'm good at listening and remembering, but not so much with the polite banter. In case you hadn't caught that yet," he added deprecatingly.

[theycalledmeacurse]

His words certainly took Marie by surprise, especially with the way he started out. It was instinct that had her not jumping to those false conclusions and assuming the worst about her soulmate, and so she took it in stride as he finished tumbling over himself with his words.

She was quiet for a moment after he finished, thinking over everything he'd said, before she gave him a soft smile and a light squeeze on his arm. "Not everyone has to be a smooth talker, Steve," she told him gently. "Sometimes the fellas who do all the talking are the ones who never spare a second to hear what anyone else is saying." That smile broadened as she added, "And I would love to meet Bucky. Lead the way, sugar."

[mini_steve]

"Aww, it's not like that," he said, scuffing his shoe on the pavement as they walked. "He's a good guy. He... Well, he kinda does the talking for me, I guess? I always get all these thoughts in my head and 'm not great at articulating them, sometimes. Buck's the outgoing one, always draggin' me along so I don't stay cooped up in my apartment, shuttin' everyone out. Not that I do it on purpose," mostly, he silently added, "I just get lost in my own head a lot.

"Anyway," he shrugged. "We're kinda a package deal. Even if we weren't soulmates, he's been there basically my whole life, so he's... like my brother. My obnoxious, really annoying brother sometimes," he joked, casting a grin at Marie. "But he's a constant. So, I figure... an' I mean, he'll definitely want to meet you too. He actually wanted me to go out tonight with him. 'You never have enough fun, Stevie,'" he paraphrased, in a rather close proximity to Bucky's usual cajoling drawl. "Boy, is he gonna be surprised."

'Surprised' probably severely underrated how shocked - and delighted - Bucky would end up being when he met Marie.

[theycalledmeacurse]

A friend who was like a sibling--it was something she'd always wanted and envied of others who had it. Such a simple thing that meant so much and had such a profound affect on someone's life, and that was what Steve had with his soulmate. She wondered briefly what they would become, how this would shape their lives that were still just beginning.

"He sounds wonderful, I really am excited to meet him," she assured him, enjoying listening to the way Steve talked about his other soulmate. She hoped that Bucky liked her, because otherwise her relationship with Steve would never develop beyond mere acquaintances. They were a packaged deal, as Steve had said, and she took that very seriously.

"I've never had anyone like that in my life before. I'm glad that you two found each other so early on, that's really an amazing thing."

[mini_steve]

Steve had often wondered what it would've been like if he'd been like others, still searching for his soulmate. Unfortunately, his circumstances would never be considered 'normal', so the things he thought about were different; he still probably would've been preoccupied with eeking out a living, worrying whether his soulmate would like him - but he'd also be worrying if he'd survive long enough to find his soulmate. He knew people with soulmates were healthier than those without, which made him seriously question what his life and health would've been like without Bucky around to shore him up.

"It's weird, growing up with it. I know I'm real fortunate," he murmured, hoping she understood that he wasn't just taking her words as polite speech. He could hear the sincerity in her voice, and wanted her to know he took it seriously. Some day, maybe soon, she'd be able to tell when he was being genuine - which, really, Steve was always genuine, that's what got him in trouble a lot of the time - but so many people weren't, too worried about being polite and proper when they spoke. But for now, he'd just have to give her the verbal cues.

He continued in a lighter tone, "And he's gonna be over the moon to meet you. He always... Well, he thinks I need a gal in my life. Not that-- we'd have to-- ahh, jeez. I mean, there's the whole stereotype that most soulmates end up gett'n' romantic wi' each other. We just met, so I mean, soulmates or not, that's not-- I'm not pushin' fer that. Bucky might, but I can totally tell him ta back off, 'cause he's just like that sometimes." His accent was growing thicker as he tried, ineptly, to explain himself.

He was making a complete cock-up of this whole thing. She was gonna think Bucky was some overbearing, loud-mouthed asshole who had Steve under his thumb, or something. He hoped she'd get a chance, before she formed a solid opinion, to see what they were really like. Because honestly, the only reason Steve didn't hold all the power in their weird pseudo-brothership, was because he was too nice to take advantage of it. Usually.

[theycalledmeacurse]

Before long, Steve would realize that she was also someone who genuinely spoke her mind, despite that ingrained southern politeness that would never leave her no matter how long she lived in the north. She could be the most polite person in the room and she would still find a way to make herself known. Her mother used to comment on it with pride for her little woman who wouldn't be pushed down by anyone or anything.

"He's just worried about you, I'm sure," she reasoned, thinking the best of Bucky because that's clearly how Steve thought of him. "If he's like a brother to you, then he wants you to have a good life, and to him that means having a woman in your life. I can't fault him for caring about you." She smirked slightly and nudged him gently with her elbow. "But I can handle myself if he gets too pushy about matters, don't you worry."

Not that she wasn't still considering the possibilities, of course. She just needed more time.